The Evolution of the McConway McBreakfast McSandwich

One of my first posts as a food blogger was to share my findings concerning a light and quick alternative to a greasy, nasty breakfast classic. The resulting McConway McBreakfast McSandwich was one of my favorite posts.

This sandwich really hit the mark. In fact, it hit it a little too well. The eggs were rubbery and flavorless, the bacon tasted more like the byproduct of a food laboratory than the blessed gift from a noble animal, and the American cheese tasted like, well, American cheese. Yes, I'd created a low fat version of the fabled Egg McMuffin but it was not yet a truly awesome breakfast sandwich.

So I practiced and refined the recipe a couple of hundred times. Seriously, I've eaten this dish at least 3 times a week for the last 18 months. If practice makes perfect, I should be holy by now!

I call my new iteration the M³ Evolution™. Ok so it's not trademarked and I really just call it an egg sandwich. Sorry, I got caught up in the moment. I'm a little attached to this sandwich.

Regardless, the new and improved m-cubed is better in every way (not just with respect to my food photography skills). Just feast your eyes on those eggs - piled high with a fluffy tenderness matched only by the sublimely succulent tint of yellow sunshine. Gaze upon the finest fake bacon money can buy, the gourmet cheese, the tastiest light bagel toasted with care and love. This is a sandwich worth waking up for, a sandwich that will usher you into a new day and keep you content until the first pangs of lunchtime hunger rise up and say "good day".

I've come to find that the heart and soul of a truly awesome breakfast sandwich is the eggs. Over time I've tossed the Styrofoam microwaved eggs and passed beyond the greener glass-microwaved huevos. Nuked eggs, no matter how much care you take, will always end up dry and rubbery.

Somewhere around the 179th attempt at this sandwich I got sick and tired of my fascist all-white egg mix and bland basil-substitute. Nowadays I sneak a whole yolk into my trio of egg whites and cook them unseasoned. Sure it adds two points, but what an addition! There's so much flavor in the yolk, and it makes the resulting eggs so tender and delicious!

I've gotten pretty good at not overcooking the eggs, which is crucial. I can't quite explain the technique in words, but thanks to the miracle of internet publishing I've created a short video which explains my method. Brace yourselves readers, because NTSCBlog.com is going multimedia!

The only down side is that my newfound culinary joy rings up at a whopping 6 points, a stark increase from the original 3 point version and a scant 1 point less than a "real" Egg McMuffin. Personally, I can skip a snack here and there for the privilege of such a wonderful start to the day. The irony is that I'm usually less hungry during the day when I make one of these for breakfast.

However, if you must you can leave the yolk out of the egg and save 2 points. Cooking the egg instead of nuking it is still a tremendous improvement. Also, lacto-ovo vegans or careful points counters can also omit the fakon, if you must (horror!).

But this is about more than just arithmetic. This is about the most important meal of the day (despite what some naysayers blather on about)! This is about eggs that aren't artificial. It's about fresh bread. This is about a sandwich that is blissfully imperfect, gloriously personal. This is food made with your hands! And it's good for you!

All dishes, however modest, should aspire to such greatness.

Update 10/4/06 - This photo was entered in this month's Does My Blog Look Good in This photography contest!

Give Me My Coffee - A Pictorial

Given that I'm fully 1/2 Colombian you'd think I'd have black coffee roaring through my veins. Truth is that I didn't start drinking the stuff until I was well out of college and into the working world. I still don't drink very much because I have to limit my caffeine intake out of respect for my wife (who I can keep up till 4am after an afternoon cup or two). Despite my lack of consumption I've come to appreciate a really good cup of joe.

That's why I leapt at the opportunity to have my friend Craig show me how to turn raw green coffee beans...

...into dark brew-ready beans.

The idea of roasting your own isn't exactly new, and as I've come to learn it's actually pretty easy. Roasting at home has obvious advantages as far as freshness is concerned, but the biggest advantage for me is that green beans keep for far longer than roasted beans. I don't keep coffee around the house because it's lifeless and dead by the time I get to drinking it (usually when company is over). This method is also cheaper and more interesting. Craig pointed me to Sweet Maria's, an online coffee encyclopedia and store. They have a wealth of info on roasting your own and sell a pretty daunting selection of raw beans.

Craig uses the "Air-Popper" method, which leverages a popcorn popper to roast the beans in a jet of hot air. Due to the obnoxious smoke emitted from the roaster he does this outside with the lid off.

Here's Craig swirling the popper around to help the fan circulate the beans. This keeps the bottom beans from burning.

After a few minutes, we get to the "first crack", which sounds a lot like popcorn. The beans will pop and expand, while emitting a stream of chaff. Here are the beans right before the first crack.

There's an intermediate period as the beans continue to roast, then the "second crack" begins. We roasted our beans just until the second crack started, resulting in a "full city roast".

The next step is to quickly evacuate the beans to two sieves and toss to cool. Craig wants to mod his popper to have two switches, one each for the fan and element. This would allow him to quickly cool the beans in the roaster without tossing. It also would prolong the life of the popper (he's already on his second one).

The first picture in this post doesn't give a great indication of the expansion of the beans and dramatic color change. Here's a better shot.

Then it's a short rest (12 hours) to let the CO₂ from the roasting leech out of the beans. Total time from popper-on to rest, no more than 10 minutes. This is something that can be done the afternoon before so you can have uber-fresh roasted coffee the next morning.

The nuances of roasting your own are considerable, as if making a fine whiskey or roux. Sweet Maria's has an excellent tutorial on roast times, temperatures and resultant roast qualities. We made two batches. The first was a full city roast, which had no bitterness and a very light flavor. The second was a French roast, which had a more pronounced nuttiness and a hint of bitterness.

The final step? Grind and roast. The resultant coffee was stupendous, worthy of being consumed without cream and sugar adornment. For this occasion I pulled out my favorite mug, a bad-ass Jesse Ventura gubernatorial campaign mug I snagged at a white-elephant exchange a few Christmas' ago.

I passed over several tasty gifts in order to snag this priceless piece of American political history - and I've never looked back.

Coffee is point-free if you drink it black (which this coffee is good enough to). However, given it's joyfully abundant caffine, be sure to drink an extra glass of water during the day.

You know when you're a major blogger dork...

...when you have your blog url engraved on your shiny new iPod.

I'm such a loser.

At long last, it is complete!

I've tapped countless megabytes of space discussing Alton Brown and Good Eats on this blog. I don't hide my particular devotion. No, I've embraced it.

Along the way, unbeknownst to you, I've been working on a sort of culinary Manhattan Project which has finally come to fruition. Brace yourself readers, because I have finally completed a task so daunting that it's taken me 19 months and two DVRs to complete! I have now officially seen every episode of Good Eats.

I started last winter during season 8. I'd realized that I'd seen many of the episodes, and that with Food Network's daily airing of GE I could manage to catch every episode in time. It was especially easy given the Good Eats Fan Page's thorough documentation of each show.

With Wednesday's airing of Let Them Eat Foam (GE's study of cake baking) I have now seen every episode from Steak Your Claim to Peachy Keen. Along the way I've bought AB recommended gear, acquired two AB cookbooks, constructed an honest to goodness flower pot smoker and even managed to find my way into an episode (which I still can't believe actually happened).

Favorite episodes? The Man Food Show is probably my favorite single episode, followed closely by A Beautiful Grind (sausage making, which has been on my to-do list and my DVR for two years) and the dynamic duo of Where There's Smoke There's Fish (smoked salmon) and Q (pulled pork). Sorry, but I tend to gravitate towards the manly, the meaty and the smokey. And you wonder why I like Meathenge so much...

So given this mission it's no surprise that AB and company seem to have appeared in these pages so much in the last year and a chunk. In fact, I consider him and his crew to be the Godfathers (and Godmothers) of this blog. I'd have never started if I hadn't had so much fun learning how to cook.

Without inspiration there would be no documentation...catch my drift?

So here's to you Good-Eaters! Let's see some more!

Some notes:

1. Yes, I've also seen both specials. Next question...
2. Yes I've also seen every episode of Feasting on Asphalt. It's one of the few shows I've seen where I've been truly sad that they were over.
3. The picture is a sign from a restaurant of the same name near my office.
4. There are exactly 29 hyperlinks in this post...a new record!
5. I'm still waiting for GE to tackle going whole hog. I've submitted this show idea to the Food Network, but as of yet their people haven't called.

Things to eat before you die

I've been tagged by my buddy Jeff at C for Cooking for The Traveler's Lunchbox "Things to eat before you die" meme. I love memes, and I'm happy to contribute and keep things going!

So what are the great dining experiences of my life? As I mentally searched through my library of great meals I found that more often than not the gnocchi that floated to the top involved cooking experiences, not dining experiences. My relationship with food has many facets, so accordingly my 5 great food-related experiences come from all angles.

1. Cook a giant meal for those you love - It's no secret that I love to entertain, but finger foods and appetizers aren't nearly as fun to make (or eat) as the proverbial feast made for a large group. Thanksgiving is the Superbowl of annual feasts and I've been honored to make several big dinners for my family and good friends in the last few years (apparently having a food blog gives you T-day cred with your friends).

This is a shot of the Thanksgiving meal I helped prepare for my bible study and a dozen or so of our friends last year. I was in charge of the bird, an incredible ham, stuffing and a huge tray of cheesy mashed potatoes. Everyone had a blast - especially Terri (flashing her million dollar smile).

2. Go whole hog - Unfortunately, this is an unfulfilled dream of mine, to spend a whole day preparing and smoking a whole piggy. This is my Mt. Everest, a heady feat of culinary daring that I hope to climb one day. Why? Because it's there.

I have been to one honest-to-goodness pig pickin' at my Dad's 50th birthday party. This beauty was the other guest of honor!

3. Check out your butt in a mirror - Ok, so this isn't food related per the usual definition. But I've been overweight my whole life, most of it in my ass. Yep, as my mom is fond to point out, I inherited her ample backside. So when I finally managed to lose enough weight to fit into a rockin' pair of jeans, I took the extra couple of minutes to admire my derriere. Everyone should feel that kind of victory.

And no, I'm not posting a picture of my butt. This isn't that kind of blog.

4. Go to the Old Lahaina Luau on a perfect Maui night - Hawaii is our favorite spot on Earth, and Maui is as perfect as they come in the Aloha state. We traveled to this island for just one reason, to attend the Old Lahaina Luau.

It rained the entire week we were in Maui, but for this one outdoor evening it was perfect (that's where our after picture was taken for the paper). The food there was incredible, and the entertainment exceeded our expectations. I still have dreams about the kalua pork and tuna poke! I can't see going to this island without sharing in this perfect Hawaiian experience. You HAVE to make sure you get there early enough to watch the imu ceremony, where they remove the pig from its earthen oven (see whole hog, above).

Sorry the picture is a bit blurry, but those wahine were moving! (You know you've been married long enough when you have dreams about HRC, not hula girls)

5. Go to a wine tasting at the Altesino Winery, Montalcino, Italy - This Tuscan winery could not be in a more idyllic or picturesque setting. Admittedly, I was not a connoisseur of wine when I visited, but I was much more of one when I left.

The wine wasn't the only attraction. They also prepared a delectable sampling of local and regional tastes for us to enjoy with the various vintages and styles of wine. It was here that my love for true Italian food blossomed into an obsession. I hope I never forget what real prosciutto tastes like...

So now it's time to pass on the meme. I think I'll tag:

• The dynamic trio that is the Three Tarts (does that count as three?)
  
• Chef Anne at Chef on Call
• Judy at Judy's Pages cause she's new to me and I'd like to hear her opinion!
  

Great Balls of Fire!

In a discussion on the merits of tailgating and other pre-game rituals, Jenny noted that tailgating is just an excuse "for guys to drink beer, eat food that's bad for you and talk sports." Not since the Gettysburg Address had such a statement been so succinct and so true.

Tailgating is all about food with balls, not sissy cucumber sandwiches and tea. As I was planning my last tailgating menu I was concerned that fish tacos were a little too fru-fru for such an event. It wasn't until George Duran took us on a spicy food tour on HOTS that I found what I was looking for...grilled jalapeno poppers!

First, I needed some special equipment. Ol' George had himself a fancy jalapeno grilling rig. I checked my local patio and bbq store, and such an item ran about $25. I thought that was a little excessive, so I set out to make my own. In retrospect, it wasn't worth the time. It takes forever to bend up a sheet of steel and drill 20 holes big enough for the peppers. Don't be a cheapskate and pick up the real thing. Or you can get an aluminum tin and punch a couple of holes. Trust me, I learned about this afterwards.

Other than the equipment, the only other major concern is the filling. Since I was looking to prove a point by making a low-point tailgating spread, I determined that my little fiery creations should follow suit.

My filling consists of fat-free refried beans (about 1/2 of a can), green onions (handful, sliced thin), turkey bacon (handful, chopped) and some cayenne pepper, salt and a few squirts of chipotle tabasco thrown in for good measure. I made about 4 times more filling than I actually needed, so keep track of those points.

I got the excellent idea of loading the filling in a zip-lock baggie to create an impromptu piping bag at the party. This worked great until the second pepper, when the cheapo bag esploded all over my prep table and I had to use my (clean) fingers to fill each morsel.

Speaking of which, I just lopped off the top of each pepper and scraped out all the seeds. In light of previous jalepeno incidents, I used a pair of latex gloves to insulate my hands and eyes from the hell juice. My friends all got a kick out of that.

Once filled, each popper gets topped with a little Mexican blend shredded cheese, and thrown into the grill.

As for how long to grill them for, I have no idea. Let's say a beer's worth of time, or if you're like my friends take 3 beers worth (30-40 minutes, I guess, for the designated drivers).

Here's the glorious end result. Sizzling hot, with just enough toasted cheese on top. As you can see, my crappy home made grilling rig didn't do a very good job of keeping them upright. The good news is that the cheese kept everything from spilling out.

Eating these bad boys is a little like playing Russian roulette in your mouth. If you're really good at scraping out the insides of the peppers, the flavor is pretty tasty and mild. If not, I suggest you have liquid relief standing by.

These babies barely register a ripple on the points meter. The beans, cheese and turkey bacon are the only elements that are above zero points, so count accordingly. My entire batch of 12 poppers came out to around 4 points. So by the time your stomach is begging for mercy, you're down about a point or two.

A solemn and sincere Nutter-Butter memorial

I has been said by many that we've all been touched personally by the attacks on September 11th. Until today, I had been mercifully insulated from personal tragedy. Those three thousand victims were close to my heart in spirit, but also a somewhat foggy image in my mind.

Today is different. Jeff at C for Cooking shared a deeply personal memoir regarding his loss on that day. His brief story really hit me, more so than most. I can no longer say I don't know anyone who lost a loved one in the attacks.

I arrived at my local Red Cross blood bank too late that day in 2001 to actually donate blood. The lines were already hundreds of feet long - running out into the street and down the block. As the tired and desperate Red Cross workers herded us back to our cars and home, I was forced to accept that I wasn't able to do what I could. None of us knew that there were no survivors to receive our donation.

So today I resolved to do what I could not 5 years ago. I haven't had much time for cooking and blogging lately, but I made the time to go and give a pint for a stranger. Just as Jeff has mourned and found love again, I vowed to mourn those who were tragically lost and to do my part to save a life so that others may partake of the precious gift given to me by God.

Thus I ate my post-donation Nutter Butters and apple juice in silence, thinking about what this pint means to someone I've never met. I hope that you all are moved to do the same.

To find a blood drive, you can got to www.givelife.org or call 1-800-Give-Life.

This post is about tailgating, not bad officiating.

Since this is not a sports blog, I won't mention the horrible call at the end of the first half that handed Notre Dame the victory over my beloved Yellow Jackets this Saturday. No, that would be off topic, and discussing how our upset was handed away by some terrible refs would not fit in with my little site.

Instead, I'll focus on our pre-game activities. Tailgating is almost the best part of attending a major sporting event, especially when the stupid Big 10 zebras call a ball down even when I could clearly tell that Calvin Johnson came up with an amazing catch (again). But I digress...

Since my buddy Lou treated me to 43 yard line seats, I decided to treat him to a delicious and healthy spread before the game. I've cooked lots and lots of chickens and brats this summer, but not a single grilled fish taco. As of Saturday, I evened the count.

The concept was simple. Armed with a portable grill, I put the hurt on a couple of slabs of mahi-mahi (left), a half pound of shrimp (right) and a couple of chunks of marinated chicken (center, for safety's sake).

Now I've had sauteed mahi here before, but grilling brings out the fish's texture and adds a delicious brown crust. For these morsels, I used Bobby Flay's recipe for fish taco marinade, substituting regular chili powder for his hoity-toity ancho chili powder and adding a few cloves of crushed garlic for some punch.

The shrimp were skewered (shell on) and tossed on until just pink. I intended to de-shell them after cooking and season them with a little Old Bay, but the natives were getting restless and wanted to eat. No patience.

I turned to some tried and true methods to round out the tacos. Low-fat tortillas tossed on the grill for a few sections form an awesome base, while shredded cabbage, low fat shredded cheese, a squeeze of lime and some freshly-made pico de gallo (recipe below) add the final strata of flavors to the party.

Batting second in the order, some black bean and corn salad (a staple in our household) complimented the nuevo-southwestern flavors nicely. Or would have - had I remembered to pack forks. Did I mention the salad keeps nicely, too?

It doesn't take a blind ref to see that this is a lot of food. I planned for feeding two, but accidently created a taco spread for a party of six. I guess a little of everything adds up to a lot of something. Fortunately, there were several extra alumni around to help us eat the feast.

Yep, no one left this football party upset. Especially the Fighting Irish.

Quick Pico de Gallo

3 Roma Tomatoes, diced
1 handful Red Onion, diced
1/2 Jalapeno, seeds removed and finely minced
2 cloves Garlic, smashed with a fork
1 handful Cilantro, chopped
Lime Juice
Hot Sauce

Combine first five ingredients. Add lime juice and hot sauce to taste. Serve immediately.

Makes approximately 2 cups. This is a point-free food, if eaten in reasonable quantities.

P.S. - I've taken a serious likening to Tabasco's Chipotle hot sauce - both because of its mild smoky flavor and because it's just plain fun to say chipotle.

P.P.S. - Two fish tacos are 8 points (3 pts-2 tortillas, 3 pts.-1/3 fillet of mahi or 6 shrimp, 2 pts./1/4 cup cheese). Obviously this will vary wildly according to what brands of ingredients you use and how much you use of them, so measure and adjust accordingly.