Never Trust a Skinny Chef...

Our Turkey is Done!

2007-11-22T13:59:00.001-05:00

Lucy Eileen Conway
Born 8:27 AM, Nov. 20th 2007
6 lbs. 8 oz.
19" long
Jenny and I are proud to announce the birth of our little girl, Lucy! She's so beautiful, and all three of us are having a blast being a little family. This is the best Thanksgiving ever!

Sally wanted an update...

2007-11-07T17:38:00.000-05:00

...so I guess I should post one! This is a shot of the new star taken yesterday.

We only have a week or two left, and both mother and child are doing great! I'll totally put up some photos after the birth.

Thanks again for all the kind words and support. Who knew there were so many awesome people out there?

Saying Goodbye...

2007-08-17T10:59:00.000-04:00

Today I finally announce a decision that I've been struggling with mightily for quite some time now. After two wonderful years, I've decided to submit my final post.

Few people understand what this truly means to me. Food blogging has been the most important work of my life, and a central part of my identity over the last two years. Finally here was a hobby that combined my love of food, photography and writing, and it allowed me to share a bit of wisdom I'd gained over the last 5 years of managing my weight.

So why stop? As much as I've loved food blogging, there are other things that I'm more interested in spending my time doing. My biggest goal moving forward is to spend more time with my wife and baby. Fatherhood is a vocation that I accept with an open heart, and I want to concentrate my life on savoring the joys of our new family.

Another reason is more personal. I've found over the last few months that I've started to enjoy cooking in private much more than cooking in public. This blog has been a witness to an interesting transformation in my life from food lover to a true food connoisseur. My culinary skills have increased by an order of magnitude, and I've found new ways to enjoy food. Still, I'm to the point where I cook more for the satisfaction of a meal well made, well plated and well eaten. The extra step of documenting this process is much less important to me than it has been in the past.

The last reason is much more pragmatic. As I've grown older I've found that I'm increasingly squeezed by a myriad of outside sources. Work is a constant companion, as is commitments to family, friends, church and a host of other parties. In addition, food blogging has often hindered my efforts to control my weight and improve my relationship with food. Let's call this last reason "the million little things that get in the way".

Sure, I'll miss all of my readers. I'll still be active in the community, visiting your blogs and leaving a tidbit of info or two. As of right now, though, I think this is a good place to finish this grand experiment of mine.

I want to thank all of you for your company, your support and most certainly for your comments. I'd like to especially thank my sister, who has contributed a lot to NTSCBlog.com, and my mother, who has been a constant cheerleader.

Most of all I'd like to thank my wonderful wife Jenny. She always recognized how important Never Trust a Skinny Chef was to me, and always supported me as I made her wait to eat her dinner while I snapped a picture or two. Few men are blessed enough to have a wife like mine, and fewer bloggers are lucky enough to have such an amazing and supportive patron behind the scenes.

Happy trails...until we meet again...

William

P.S. - I forgot to mention, but I'm keeping this NTSC on the web indefinitely. I still use it as a recipe book!

I may post a recipe or two in the future if something particularly awesome comes my way. Also, I'm totally going to post pictures of the baby when he/she comes. If you keep up with this blog on an RSS reader, I wouldn't delete the feed...

Got a bun in the oven...

2007-06-27T12:47:00.000-04:00

...and not of the cinnamon variety! Meet the newest addition to the Conway family! Needless to say Jenny and I are absolutely thrilled. Here's the little one, looking from above. You can see two wee bitty little arms up against its body. The big black circle is its brain (very impressive), and the two smaller black circles in front are the baby's eyes.

The baby is due (appropriately enough) around Thanksgiving. Don't worry, I'll still get my long-awaited brown sugar-brined turkey post done.

Oh, and now that the news is out, let me just tell you what a galactically bad idea it is to make six pounds of fresh sausage in a house with a severely nauseated pregnant woman. It may seem like it'd be ok, but it's not. It's really not.

Save Microbrewery Tours in Georgia!

2007-06-12T16:44:00.000-04:00

As many of you know, I love my job. Recently my awesome job got about 30 notches more awesome-er with the arrival of our new neighbors...

That's right, the Atlanta Brewing Company moved in a scant 500 feet down the street from us! As if producing beer wasn't enough of a community service, they also offer brewery tours three times a week for $6 $7. This entitles you to generous samples from their tasting room, an ABC glass and a guided tour of the brewery. Needless to say I've taken the tours several times.

I wish my excitement and joy were the end of the story, but alas the government is interfering with this public service. I recently got word that the Georgia Dept. of Revenue is aiming to gun down these brewery tours. Why they'd want to do that I'll never know (my guess is that the big breweries and distributors are angry that they're not making money off of them). What I do know is that I'm throwing the full weight of this blog behind stopping it.

The proposed rule is GA DOR notice number AT-2007-1-560-2-2-.61. It would drastically limit the amount of alcohol served to patrons and guests on the tour.

If you're a local reader of NTSC, I implore you to communicate your disgust at this fascist action by our state government. You can communicate this directly to the DOR's head, Commissioner Graham, via e-mail, and to your local elected representatives through this site.

Here's my letter:

Commissioner Graham,

A recent proposal by the Georgia Dept. of Revenue was brought to my attention concerning the serving of patrons and guests at microbrewery tours in Georgia.

I oppose adoption of the proposed rule change and respectfully urge the department to withdraw proposed rule 3a. I believe that such a change would harm or destroy craft brewing in the state of Georgia.

At first glance, this proposed rule change would undermine the breweries' considerable investment in their facilities. Many breweries run on lean profits, and could not afford the financial hit.

Looking deeper, these brewery tours are a major marketing and advertising resource for the breweries. They're essential for their operation. By stripping them of this resource, we endanger their financial well-being and risk losing their many benefits to the community, such as their contribution to tax revenue, to the job base and their efforts to promote community goodwill and service.

On a more personal level, I frequently attend these tours, and use the tours to entertain out-of-state guests, friends and business associates. Without this important attraction, I will be harmed personally, professionally and financially.

Local breweries are already strained under the current "three tier" system of production, distribution and sales, and all help must be given to sustain this important cultural resource. Microbrewing is a craft, and to lose this craft would seriously mar the culinary landscape in Georgia.

Act fast! The Department must receive all comments regarding the proposed Rules from interested persons no later than 10am on June 19th, 2007.

Update 6/13/07 - Whew! Now that I've had a day to calm down, let me clarify a few things.

The rule would dramatically reduce the amount of alcohol served to guests on a brewery tour. For example, ABC limits their sampling to 6 pints of beer per person.

The proposed rule would reduce that limit to 2 oz. of beer per variety served to guests. If you've been to such a brewery tour in Atlanta, you'll know that these are major events, often drawing 50 to 100 people to sample beer and talk brewing with the staff. I feel that if they curtailed the amount of alcohol served that these tours would dry up and ultimately go away.

The government probably is cracking down on the "speakeasy effect" of serving so much to individual guests. In all honesty, I'm obviously a big fan of the cheap beer available on a Friday afternoon.

But I'm also concerned that we're losing our microbrewing industry in Georgia. My favorite brewery (Dogwood Brewery) closed it's doors a few years ago because they just couldn't compete under Georgia's draconian alcohol laws. I fear that the three remaining major microbreweries (ABC, Sweetwater and Terrapin) could face a similar fate. I think that these small breweries should be given any assistance possible.

I'm honest and sincere in my belief that craft brewing is an art and should be preserved.

Update 7/2/07 - Here's an excellent article from the AJC on the proposed action. It sounds like our collective voices are being heard! (Thanks LLA for the tip!)

A vacant blog, a window into my life

2007-05-24T00:19:00.000-04:00

Oh how I wish I could fill this space with carefully crafted stories of food and health, with postcard-perfect pictures of delectable treats. How I wish to cuddle with my laptop and dream a foodie dream with you.

Instead, I'm here at work at 12:21 AM writing a post to let you know that I'm once again not dead. I probably won't be back until mid June, so until then, all I can offer you this cartoon (from Toothpaste for Dinner):

Which one are you? I'm all of the above...

P.S. - As a random bonus tidbit, here's some Lava-cue. Too bad they don't sell molten earth at my supermarket.

Project PRR Part 2 - Goals, Planning and Practice

2007-04-30T18:45:00.000-04:00

When I last left off, I was discussing my motivation behind finally starting a serious exercise regimen. The ultimate goal (other than a healthier me) is to compete in this year's Peachtree Road Race.

I'm now 8 weeks into my 16 weeks of preparation and training, and I've come to learn that training for a distance run is a heck of a lot like losing weight. The steps are the same, the actual practice is just a little different.

Step 1: Set Goals

It's impossible to get to where you're going without a little direction. Recently I've come up with a brief list of goals for my training. In order, they are:

I don't want to get hurt - Nuff said. Listen to your body and you'll be ok. It will tell you if you're about to get really hurt.
I want to finish the entire 10k (6.2 miles) - If they're going to take me away in an ambulance, I want it to be after I get my t-shirt.
I want to finish in a competent manner - I want to feel like I really pushed myself and at a pace that's faster than if I had not trained. The biggest reason I'm training is to feel like I'm getting into shape. I want to finish feeling like I stepped up my degree of physical fitness a level or three.
I want to finish the Ptree in 70 minutes - That means that I'm jogging or running almost the entire distance.
I want to finish in under 60 minutes - If I reach this goal, I'll be ecstatic! This would be the biggest feat of athleticism I've ever done.

Step 2: Figure out The Plan

Now that that's in place, we move on to The Plan. This is what I've done so far to get myself into shape.

The biggest key to starting is going slow (see Goal #1, above). Every time I've ever started exercising I've destroyed my body in the first day and quit. This time I started very slow and worked my way up as my body got used to the exercise. This is why my knees are still in good shape, even two months into it.

Next, I've come up with a training regimen. Whether you're doing a couch-to-5k program, or you just get it out of a book (like I did), a written plan allows you to pace yourself. This way you won't start too hard or progress too slowly.

I've also been using a heart rate monitor to make sure I've been going at a good pace. The biggest benefit I've seen, other than not killing myself, is that I can now pretty accurately gauge how hard I'm working my body based on how I feel when I'm running. Nowadays I've replaced the monitor with an iPod for most of my workouts, but I still use it from time to time to keep myself honest.

Step 3: Do it!

When I started I was really concerned that I'd lose interest. When my buddy John told me about a 5k (half my goal distance) this last weekend (halfway to the Ptree), I jumped on the opportunity. Having an intermediate goal really helped me stay focused and motivated.

The Sprint for Cancer 5K was FANTASTIC! This is my first ever road race, and it was unbelievable!

First off, I have a special connection to this cause as my Abuelo William Elias died of cancer when I was a teenager. The race promoters even allowed us to put a memorial on the back of the race t-shirts.

Why didn't anyone tell me that racing is so much fun?! Knowing that I trained for it and seeing my training pay off is one of the best things I've ever done for myself.

Here's John and myself at the end of the race. John's a big time loser when it comes to weight (his story is pretty similar to mine). He destroyed the 10k, finishing well under the time necessary to qualify for a ranked spot for the Peachtree.

Ok, so how did I do? I finished the 5k in 31:50, which is about 3 minutes faster than my fastest training time. I guess I got a little pumped up at the start and pushed myself pretty hard!

This is great, because I feel like I'm exactly where I should be to complete the Peachtree. Next up I've signed up for a 4 mile race in June. I can't wait!

I love the smell of mesquite in the morning!

2007-04-27T08:16:00.000-04:00

So you didn't think that I went through all that trouble to make my own sausage just to heat it up in the microwave, did you? No the only proper cooking method for Texas-style sausage is low and slow with plenty o' smoke.

One of my new years' resolutions for NTSC was to actually smoke something other than chicken. Sure my past results have been tasty, but I'm getting kinda bored with it. Besides, I want to graduate up to more advanced BBQ challenges. Sausage then seems like an easy weekend trip.

My normal smoking fodder is hickory, but for this episode I decided to follow the spirit of the west and use a little mesquite. I'd have loved to use a mixture of oak and mesquite, but last time I checked there weren't any oak trees laying around my condo and I don't think my association would've appreciated it if I had started felling trees, even if it was to smoke some meat.

The day was perfect for smoking meat. It was about 70 degrees outside and sunny, with just a little wind. And it was early enough so I didn't have to risk getting the fire department called on my butt. Even though my smoker is legal for use in a condo, I still don't want to have to explain why to a bunch of guys with axes and hoses at my door.

When I lifted the lid I saw exactly what I was looking for - a six-pack of mahogany links, glistening with little beads of fat on the surface. Let's take a closer look...

So juicy! So succulent! So over-smoked! Yep, I didn't break out my meat thermometer until it was way too late. They were on the smoker for an hour and a half, and the internal temperature was 20° more than the 160° I was aiming for. Note to self: use the probe thermometer next time!

You don't need a whole lot of wood chips to smoke sausage, either. I'd say about a cup should do nicely. Oh, and remember to soak them in water (or beer) for an hour before tossing them into your smoker.

All in all I think the collagen casings did the job. First off, they did a great job of allowing the smoke to pass into the meat.

This is what we in the barbecue world refer to as a "smoke ring". It's formed by a chemical reaction between the meat and the nitrates in the smoke. It means that you actually used smoke to cook and flavor the meat. Last time I checked a lot of "barbecue" places didn't have meat with smoke rings. Be wary of such impostors!

Otherwise, the collagen casings didn't "stick" to meat very well. This could be a rookie mistake like under stuffing the sausages. This also allowed some of the casings to get a little dry and "papery". I'll have to do another batch sometime and report back. For the time being I'd still recommend using them because they're so darn easy to use. Feel free to comment if your experience differs!

The sausage, aside from being a little overcooked, was pretty good. I'd have liked a little more assertive flavor so perhaps I'll up the seasonings a bit. I'm still pretty happy with the result.

Were they the match for my experience in Lockhart? Hell no. I'm but a gnat to those juggernauts of smoked meat. But this was a good start, and I'm excited to try again. For my next sausage making adventure, I'm planning on making a batch of real frankfurters for this year's celebration of National Hot Dog Day. I can't wait!

FYI - The six links above were destined for a pot-luck dish for a church gathering. I combined the meat with a few marinated grilled chicken breasts and a batch of my chipotle rice. The end result is sort of a "Tex Mex Jambalaya".

I really liked this dish. The sausage is pretty high in points (8 per link, to be exact), so serving a few chunks with rice and a little chicken is a great way to enjoy the smoky meaty flavor without breaking the points bank.

How to be a C-list food blogger

2007-04-25T09:15:00.000-04:00

So this is a few weeks late, but I'd like to officially celebrate Never Trust a Skinny Chef's second birthday! It seems like yesterday, but two years ago I was sitting at my computer writing my first (real) post about visiting my family for Easter. Here's my contribution to the Easter egg hunt this year. Happy Birthday NTSC!

So it seems like the cool thing to celebrate your anniversary by writing a post about your tips for budding food bloggers. The Amateur Gourmet (twice) and Delicious Days both did so recently, and they're both very cool.

The problem is that they're both giants in the food blogging world. They do an excellent job and are real role models for the rest of us, but the fact of the matter is that dozens of food blogs are created every day and not everyone reaches that level of fame or success. We need a primer for the rest of us.

So without further ado, here's my list of how to be a C-lister like me.

Step 1. Be realistic.
When I started I spent a lot of time reading tons of blogs trying to figure out how to get big. Hey, I'm a first born and I need the attention. After about 7 or 8 months, I got really bummed out. I realized I'd probably never take pictures like Keiko, cook like Clotilde, write like Molly, or have really wicked web design like Nicky.

And then a funny thing happened. I stopped caring. I just cooked for fun, took pictures because it was cool and worked on my writing because I went to college (out of state) for 5 years and should expect a little more for my parents' $65k. And my blog got better.

Step 2. Find your voice.
In the beginning I was trying really hard to be the next Food Network Star. I was all about being polished and professional, with insightful commentary and interesting historical research.

Then I woke up and realized that I was a total hack. I'm only a slightly above average cook, and my literary skills are more See Spot Run than War and Peace. I stopped trying to be Martha Stewart and just started writing like I was talking to my wife or my friends. Heck, I even cracked a joke or two. And my blog got better.

Step 3. Write whenever you feel like it.
The first thing you can do to get a lot of traffic is write everyday. If you're a working stiff like me, the worst thing you can do is write every day. I've tried doing 3-4 posts a week and my writing was total crap. My pictures were worse.

So once again I stopped trying so hard to please everyone all the time. I write when I'm inspired and when I'm not, I take a break. I may not have a ton of traffic, but I still love blogging and I think my blog got better.

Step 4. Make friends.
I write for myself, but I also write for my loyal readers and fellow bloggers who participate in this worldwide obsession with food. Getting to know other bloggers, like Jeff and Anne, has been really wonderful. If I ever get back to Beantown or make the trip to the Great White North I'll be sure to get you guys a drink or two. Biggles is the real deal (and a really great guy), and Alanna is the nicest person on the internet (and a real help when your soda bread goes really wrong).

Don't forget to participate in food events (I love "Does My Blog Look Good in This?"), and to answer the random meme or two.

Also, get your Mom and sister to read your blog. They'll comment on every post, and everyone knows how much bloggers love comments (yeah, I'm talking to you!). As for the wife, she puts up with enough in the name of blogging (cold food, constant picture taking, tons of dishes) so don't even bother.

In the end this all sounds terribly harsh, but it's actually quite liberating. Once you stop trying to be the next big thing you can sit down and concentrate on making delicious food and having a good time with it. And that's what blogging is all about, isn't it?

P.S. - I totally forgot. Also read every post in Food Blog S'cool. This is where the food blogging community meets to exchange ideas and get help. It's a must-read.

Sausage is much better than politics...

2007-04-23T15:55:00.000-04:00

Laws are like sausages. It's better not to see them being made.
Otto von Bismarck
German Prussian politician (1815 - 1898)

Not many people know this, but if I could be anything in the world I'd probably be a butcher. No, not some Fast Food Nation-type meat packer, but an old-school turn-of-the-century butcher of the Texas hill country variety. If you've seen my series of posts on my trip to Lockhart, TX, you'll totally understand. If you've actually eaten at one of Lockhart's famous BBQ temples, you'll probably want to join me.

Back in the day butchers used to prep and sell meat to the surrounding community (what a concept). As part of this service the German-descended butchers near Austin also prepared sausage and barbecue to sell alongside cuts of beef, pork and other meat products. This is where Lockhart's current crop of BBQ joints came from.

Somewhere in my dreams is "William's Specialty Meats", where I spend my days making sausage and barbecue and selling it to people like me who will give it a good home, cook it like it should be cooked, and eat it like it should be eaten.

Until that day comes, I'll have to make do with a little brown egg and a few attachments to my stand mixer. I've been meaning to make sausage for years (I actually bought the mixer because Kitchen Aid was running a "free food grinder" promotion). Heck, I've probably seen the sausage episode of Good Eats a dozen times.

For my first whack at sausage making, I decided to aim high and reproduce the best damn sausage I've ever had in my short but tasty life. I still remember biting into my hot link at Smitty's. It was just the right texture, with just the right seasoning. Delicious, but the recipe isn't exactly public knowledge.

A major breakthrough came when I found this article detailing some of the methods Smitty's uses to make their sausage. I found that they ground their meat very coarse, and used a 85% beef / 15% pork mixture. Sounded good to me.

So I chunked up 1 lb. of pork shoulder...

...and 5 lbs. of beef chuck. I also took Alton's advice and froze the critical bits of my food grinder to keep the meat cool during grinding.

As for seasoning, I developed a secret mixture of 7 aromatics, herbs and spices to flavor my creation. Ok, so it's not secret and I didn't create it. I happened to find a recipe for "Texas Hill Country" sausage in Smoke and Spice, the indispensable bible for the amateur barbecuer.

I didn't get any good shots of the grind process as I had my hands full and covered in meat goo. Perhaps this is the part Bismarck was talking about. In any case, the meat was ground and put back in the fridge to cool.

When stuffing time came, I readied my collagen casings and did the deed. Purists scoff at synthetic casings, but I decided to go ahead and use them. I figured it'd make my first time easier, and I could throw natural casings into the fray after I got my feet wet.

I'd love to say the stuffing process was uneventful, but stuffing the casing without getting too much air into the link is a bit of a challenge. I'd read that collagen casings are especially tough, but I burst 3 feet of unlinked sausage because I overfilled the tube. The collagen casings are durable, but not indestructible.

Here's the end result. Aren't they beautiful? The collagen casings are nearly transparent so you can get a full view of the sausagey goodness. Now I just need a good way to cook them.

I think I have a pretty good idea...

Stay tuned for cooking and the post-game show.

Texas Hill Country Sausage
Based on this recipe from Smoke and Spice
5 lbs. Beef Chuck
1 lb. Pork Shoulder (Boston Butt)
1 lg. Onion, grated and drained of excess liquid
6 cloves Garlic, finely minced
1 tablespoon Dried Sage
1 tablespoon Salt
1 tablespoon Pepper
1 tablespoon Red Pepper Flakes
1 teaspoon Cayenne Pepper
Sausage Casings

Cube beef and pork into 1 inch cubes. Mix thoroughly with seasonings and allow to chill in a refrigerator for several hours. Run mixture through a meat grinder on the coarsest setting (approx. 1/4" holes) and return to the refrigerator to chill.

Stuff the sausage into 1.25" diameter casings. Allow to sit overnight before cooking or freezing.

Makes approx. 24 sausages, approx. 8 points per sausage.

Note: 6 lbs. is a lot of sausage. You may want to half the recipe.

Update 4/23/07 - Oops, forgot the recipe!

Adventures in Condimentry II: Viva la salsa!

2007-04-19T15:53:00.000-04:00

This is my second installment in my 437 part series "Better know a condiment". In this issue, we'll discuss an often eaten, but seldom prepared condiment from south of the border.

More than a few hours of my life have been spent trying to devise a way to keep boneless skinless chicken breasts from looking and tasting like tofu. Until recently, my best options have been as follows:

Leave the skin on.
Leave the skin on and bones in.
Leave the skin on and bones in, wrap with bacon.

Now none of those options are very low fat or Weight Watcher friendly. My stance for the last few months has been to say "screw it" and just eat chicken like I feel like it, which is why I now have a full-size spare instead of a rubber donut.

So once again I have to face the hard reality that I can't necessarily eat everything I want all the time. As much as WW brands itself as a "lifestyle change" and not a "diet", the inescapable truth is that I have to cut back every now and again. The good news is that I've found another way to flavor up my chicken (and hot dogs, pork, rice, etc.).

Yep, that's right - vegetables, herbs and aromatics. But what shall I do with these miscellaneous gifts from the Earth? Make salsa verde, says I!

I was introduced to the process of making said salsa by my coworker John. Sure, salsa verde has existed since man started walking upright, but I'd never actually considered making it until he brought it to a company lunch. His recipe was great, but it wasn't until I watched Tyler Florence make it that I really got excited.

(As an aside, I've come to love his show "Tyler's Ultimate". It's educational and he prepares pretty good stuff. If only I could make my DVR play it at 2/3rds speed. Dang that dude talks fast!)

Now I know you all have a pound of tomatillos hanging around the house. I know I do all the time. For those of you who don't, I recommend heading to your local farmers market or ethnic food store. Thanks to the exploding Hispanic population in Atlanta I've got ready access to tomatillos, jalapeños and other south-of-the-border delights.

Tyler's recipe is pretty easy (you can check it out here), but I couldn't help but modify it just a smidge. First, I'd leave out the lime juice. It just goes into the salsa and reverse roundhouse kicks all the other flavors into submission. If you're into having a lime-powered karate chop to the tongue, go right ahead. It'd just go easy on the lime and taste it as I go along.

Second, I'd toss all the ingredients in extra virgin olive oil before baking. Sure, it may ruin this condiment's no-point status, but adding a tablespoon of olive oil adds a scant few points (4 points to the batch, to be exact) and a lot of depth of flavor.

Finally, I'd either crank the temperature up to 500°, or just broil the ingredients. If you broil, you'll need to keep an eye on them and rotate them once during cooking.

Yes I know that yet another post on salsa is not going to rock the food blogging world, but it's the little things that make life a little easier.

An Ode to Breakfast

2007-04-09T22:53:00.000-04:00

Smell that bacon cookin' sizzle,
Whisking eggs and biscuits rise,
Hear the fresh-brewed coffee shout
Awaken, all! Make-fast! Arise!

Waffles hiss and spit and sputter,
Flapjacks jumping, golden brown.
Last night's spuds turn this morn's hash,
OJ gulping, going down!

Who to greet this dawny feast?
Scratchy faces, droopy lids!
Who to crunch and slurp and chew?
Sunny mommies, screaming kids!

"Hail!" to all who work the dark!
"Hooray!" for breakfast makers all!
"Huzzah!" to those who prep the course!
The greatest meal, big or small!

Breakfast Casserole of Champions
Based on Cyleen Friman's Breakfast Casserole

15 Stale Pop-and-Bake Biscuits
1/2 med. Onion, roughly diced
1/2 lg. Green Pepper, roughly diced
12 oz. Bacon, chopped
18 Eggs
1 cup Milk
1 teaspoon Dried Basil
1 teaspoon Black Pepper
1/2 teaspoon Salt
2 1/2 cups Cheddar Cheese, shredded

Cook the biscuits the day before and allow to go stale. Cut each biscuit into quarters.

Cook the bacon in a non-stick skillet. Drain the bacon fat (but leave a the pan lubed up), and sweat the onions and peppers over medium heat until translucent. Set aside to cool.

Beat eggs together with milk and seasoning. Add the biscuits, 2 cups of cheese, the bacon and vegetables and mix thoroughly.

Spray a 9x13" pan with cooking spray and dump in contents. Sprinkle the top with the remaining cheese. Cover, and refrigerate overnight or for at least 8 hours.

Cover with foil (sprayed with non-stick spray on the food side) and cook in a 375° oven for 40 minutes. Remove foil and cook for 20 more minutes or until firm and cooked through.

Let the casserole rest for 5 minutes before cutting and serving.

Makes 15 servings, 8 points per serving (when made with low-fat cheese). This recipe can easily be halved, but you'll have to adjust the cooking time for a smaller casserole.

P.S. - Maybe I should have titled this post "Ode to Bad Poetry"...

And now a word from our sponsor?

2007-04-03T16:13:00.000-04:00

So I hate spam as much as the next guy, but this was too funny. I'm not one for supplements (although weight-loss pill peddling sites fill up my inbox with link requests), but after this amazing copy I think I might buy a bottle...

The newest and most attracting flesh loss product is now easily available – As were seen on ABC. Did you know that superfluous body kilograms kill a lot of people every year? We know you hate the unsightly look of people like those and the social bias against them. Or, maybe, you’ve not the will to withstand a siege of your pernicious eating habits. If it all sounds familiar, then we got something for your consideration!

Introducing ******, the later product for the reduction of your body’s extra weight.

The most astounding thing is that ****** improves the quality of your life by soothing your feeling of hunger and giving you better mood. ***** helps your mind to realize that you doesn’t have such a great need for that much food. It lifts your mood up, provides you with energy, and attacks useless kilos.

All thanks to its powerful original formula!! Worm out latest news!

I know this is off topic, but I do consider this a flesh loss blog and I think it's in my readers' best interest to be up to date on the latest technology.

I know that I often fall victim to my pernicious eating habits. Maybe I will give them a call!

Or not. And no, I won't link to your site.

Project PRR Part 1 - The Beginning

2007-03-29T22:53:00.000-04:00

I got some wicked awesome news today! My entry check was cashed today, meaning I'm going to join 55,000 runners this 4th of July in the Peachtree Road Race!

For those of you who live in the ATL you know what I'm talking about. For all of y'all who don't, the P-Tree is a 10k jaunt down Atlanta's mother road.

Let me back up. I've never been an athlete. Far from it! Yes I was always the last husky kid picked for dodge ball. I'd rather spend 4 hours doing algebra (math is fun) than have to run a lap or two in P.E. class (an excellent venue for the fit kids to pick on the slow fat kid). As my weight climbed in college my tendency towards a Jabba the Hut level of fitness escalated.

For the last 5 1/2 years, my weight loss has focused on eating less food, and trying to get out when I can and move. Exercise is especially cruel to the extremely obese. I remember trying to exercise when I was starting out, and I could barely manage to walk a mile. On a hot summer day, I'd break a sweat just sitting around my apartment.

Jenny and I have talked about entering the Peachtree since we were just two crazy kids in love. But it was never the right time, and we were never in the right shape. Well you know what? Now is the right time, and now is my window for getting in some kind of shape other than "round".

So now you're thinking, where's all this coming from? Well I have 4 motivating factors:

My resolution to lose my holiday weight has stalled like a Cessna 172 at 50 knots.
If Anne is going to do a race, then I'm going to do one too.
I saw the movie 300. As I was walking to my car some dude told his buddy - "You know what that movie makes me want to do?...sit-ups!" I had the same reaction.
I woke up three weeks ago still stuffed from dinner at Maggiano's the night before. I hated the bloated, lethargic feeling of being full 10 hours after my last meal, and I spent three hours on the internet looking for something to do about it.

So here I am, three weeks into my training regimen and I feel great. I've been following a program (which I'll detail out soon) and I'm now getting a half hour of exercise at least 5 days a week.

Has the weight come off yet? No, not really. But this isn't about the weight anymore. I'm giving myself a break from weight goals and instead I'm trying to achieve a fitness goal for once in my life. I'll let you know how it goes...

P.S. - Applications are still being accepted through the end of the week!

It's getting hot in here, so make chipotle rice...

2007-03-26T15:09:00.000-04:00

I had grand plans for posting my latest and greatest recipe last Monday, but I had a little trouble at the office.

So in light of my crazy week at work, I've decided to make chipotle rice pilaf. No that doesn't make any sense, but it's my blog and I'll do what I want to.

Anyhoo, I've always been fascinated by chipotles. I've passed by them several hundred times in the market, and somehow I've been able to avoid their siren song of heat and smoky goodness. I'm not as hard core as Sam at Becks & Posh (she made her own chipotles en adobo), but I think I've managed to take my first steps into this delicious new world.

Why rice? Well I'd love to make my own version of Nuevo Laredo's Chicken Diablo, but Jenny doesn't like super spicy food and I don't think my stomach could take eating all the leftovers. Mostly it comes from the guilt of always resorting to a boxed (horrors!) Spanish rice mix when I cook Mexican food. I guess it was high time that I man up and make some rice from scratch.

Excuse me for the ego, but I think my first real Spanish rice tastes pretty good. It's based on Good Eats' rice pilaf, but I've added a whole ton of other bits and now I think it's nothing like where it started.

Out of respect for my guests, I made this version pretty mild. If I were making it for heartier folk, I'd double the chipotles and adobo sauce. Oh and before you all start complaining, I know that there are like a half-dozen chipotles in the can. Don't worry, I'll find some use for the remaining soldiers and post about it here. Sheesh.

This recipe makes a ton of rice, which was plenty for a party of 6, but if you're not willing to eat chipotle rice pilaf for a week you can scale the recipe down. If you do, change the liquid according to Alton's recommended amounts (see scene 7).

Chipotle Rice Pilaf

3 tablespoons Olive Oil
1 med Onion, diced
1 med Green Pepper, diced
3 cups White Rice
4 lg. cloves Garlic, finely diced
2 Chipotle Peppers, seeds removed and diced
1 tablespoon Adobo Sauce
1 can (14.5 oz.) "Petite" Diced Tomatoes, drained with liquid reserved*
Approx. 2 cans (14 oz. each) Vegetable Stock*
2 teaspoons Ground Cumin
2 teaspoons Salt
2 Bay Leaves
Cilantro, for garnish

Preheat your oven to 350°.

In a large oven-safe pan or dutch oven, heat the olive oil and sweat the pepper and onion until translucent. Add garlic and rice. Cook over high heat, stirring constantly, until the rice is fragrant (it'll smell like nuts) and darkens slightly.

Add remaining ingredients, stir, and bring to a boil. Cover the pot and and bake in the oven for 20 minutes.

Remove and let sit, covered, for 20 minutes. Fluff with a fork before serving.

If you want to get all fancy-pants, garnish with cilantro. Whoever finds a bay leaf gets 1 year of good luck.

Makes 8 servings (approx. 1 cup per serving), 6 points per serving.

*Add enough vegetable stock to the reserved tomato liquid to bring the total volume to 3 1/2 cups.

Mama Conway's Tuna Antipasto*

2007-03-15T08:56:00.000-04:00

Since we're knee-deep in Lent, I thought I'd share a fasting-friendly Conway classic. Not Conway as in my family, but as in my Mom and Dad. My Mom has been making her tuna antipasto since before I knew what tuna was. Or antipasto.

You see, I have a hard time calling this dish antipasto. Sure, it's got olives, vegetables, and other elements of the antipasto course, but it's all mixed together. Really, it's more of an Italian tuna salad.

Still, it's my mom's recipe and I'll let her name it. Maybe we can compromise and add an asterisk. I'll just blame her for the confusion and disappointment I get from ordering at Italian restaurants.

My mother made this for us all the time, and not just during lent. My father was especially fond of it, most likely because my mom jams it full of olives. No wonder they've been married for 30 years. I recall that every time it was served my dad would hiss with delight and utter some kind of (clean) expletive in Spanish. He'd then eagerly load up a saltine with olives and tuna and down it in one bite.

Sadly, my lovely wife hates olives. Sad for her, because this means more antipasto* for me. (which is probably why we'll be married forever, too).

This dish has wonderfully acidic overtones from the pickles and ketchup, and the briny-ness of the olives sends the flavor rocket into orbit. There's a lot going on here!

A few notes on the ingredients. First, I used albacore tuna because I think it tastes, oh, a million times better than regular chunk light. Just be careful, because like all tasty things in life if you eat albacore too much it'll kill you. Nursing and pregnant mothers and children should use chunk light tuna. I've never tried it, but I suppose if you're a tuna hater you could use canned chicken instead.

Second, I used manzanilla olives, mostly because they're small and because they came in a handy 3 oz. container (too bad they don't come in a 5 oz. one). Finally, the mixed pickled vegetables can be found in the pickle section of your local supermarket. They usually have cauliflower, carrots, celery and onions in them.

The Tabasco sauce is optional, but adds a little kick to the antipasto*.

Anyway, this dish is a great light lunch or dinner. It's loaded full of flavor so a cup goes a long way. My mom always served it on saltine crackers, but I suppose you could do something else with it. I can't think of anything else, but that's just because it never lasts long enough for me to experiment.

Tuna Antipasto*

2 tablespoons Olive Oil
1/2 cup Onion, diced
1/2 cup Celery, diced
1/2 cup Green Pepper, diced
2 cans (6 oz. ea.) Canned Tuna, albacore preferred
1 jar (16 oz.) Mixed Pickled Vegetables, chopped into smaller chunks
1 small jar (3 oz.) Manzanilla Olives
1/2 cup Cucumber, peeled, seeded and diced
3/4 cup Ketchup
Tabasco Sauce, to taste
Salt and Pepper, to taste

Sweat the onions, celery and green pepper in the olive oil over medium heat until soft and translucent. Allow to cool.

Add remaining ingredients and mix well. Taste and adjust seasoning with hot sauce, salt and pepper. Refrigerate overnight, serve cold with saltines.

Makes 5 cups, 2 points per half cup or 5 points per cup.

P.S. - For someone who so famously hates ketchup, I've certainly been using a lot of it lately...

A great cause, and an Alton photo-op

2007-03-13T15:07:00.000-04:00

I have a long and tortuous history getting a good picture with Alton Brown. I've seen the man twice before, and each time it seems that something goes wrong. My first shot (at a book signing) was overexposed, my second (as an extra on Good Eats) was underexposed and blurry. This time I finally got it right.

Let me back up. Jenny and I attended a Chinese New Year party to raise funds and awareness for Heifer International's Chuxin Hilly Area Livestock Development project in China. If you've never heard of Heifer, you should find out more.

I don't push many charities on this blog. Maybe I should. Heifer is one of my favorites, focusing on sustainable community development. They don't just give support to the needy, they help them develop their communities through agricultural and economic initiatives.

Those are a lot of big words. Basically they don't just give them a fish, they teach them to catch their own.

This is important in this day and age where the concern isn't just poverty and need, but the unbreakable cycle that so many around the world find themselves in. While I'd love to wipe out world hunger and strife with a quick fix, I feel that grassroots development in small communities is more effective and ultimately much more important.

Enter Alton as the guest speaker at the party. His production company has been helping Heifer for several years, and in his speech he recalled Heifer's guiding principles and discussed how they mirrored his own.

Afterwards he hung out and signed autographs. I used this opportunity to apologize to AB for being rude during the filming of our Good Eats episode. He said that my paparazzi-style snapshot "wasn't so much rude, as it was dorky."

Well put, good man. Well put.

Anyway, he's a classy dude, and we had a great time hanging out and learning more about the great things one organization can do.

P.S. - So the truth must be heard. My photo op with Alton at the party went all wrong. My shirt was messed up and my eyes were closed, and immediately afterwards AB had to run to talk to reporters. Here's the original shot. So in desperation, I got my buddy Josh to take this picture, and I photoshopped the two together. You'd have done the same too, if you're as big a dork as I am.

Weeknight Eats - Cornbread Sloppy Joes

2007-03-08T13:39:00.000-05:00

I know I've taken more than a couple of cheap shots at Rachael Ray, Sandra Lee and the new generation of convenience chefs at the Food Network. Usually my angst comes in waves, and I get all hussy about the state of cooking in the world. That's why I always try to recall culinary motto #1:

I don't ever want to get so good at cooking that I don't enjoy hot dogs anymore.

I've been dangerously close to violating this rule recently, what with my fancy-pants gnocchi and oh-so Emerilized red beans and rice. Truth is that if it weren't for the "easy meals" shown on TV, most people would never cook or eat a home made dinner with their families. And that's just sad.

So I'd like to present a staple meal in the Conway household - cornbread sloppy joes. The idea comes from Jenny's college roommate. Simply put, it's a batch of sloppy joes baked with a layer of cornbread on top. This meal is a perfect wintertime comfort food - tangy meat and sweet southern-style cornbread. I ask Jenny to make it for me all the time.

Jenny has the magic touch with sloppy joes. Her secret to is to undercook the meat before seasoning. If the ground beef is overcooked, it'll turn rubbery by the time it's done and nobody wants that.

This is perfect. The ground beef is just shy of done, with little bits of pink throughout.

Now would be the time to add the ketchup, mustard, salt and pepper. If you really want to get fancy, here's the opportunity to add some cumin, tabasco, chipotles, lobster, etc. (although Jenny never does and I've never complained). Jenny also never measures the ketchup and mustard. Like I said, she's got the magic touch.

Now you could whip up some awesome cornbread from scratch, but why bother? You just got home from work, the kids are screaming and you're hungry. Also, Jiffy makes darn good cornbread and it's cheap.

This recipe isn't glamorous, but it's fast and uber-tasty. And when served with some nuked frozen vegetables and a salad, it's a great meal with plenty of leftovers for tomorrow's lunch.

Lani's Cornbread Sloppy Joes
1 1/2 lb. Extra Lean Ground Beef (93/7)
1/2 med. Onion, diced
1/2 cup + 2 tablespoons Ketchup
2 tablespoons Mustard
1 box Jiffy Cornbread batter, prepared
Salt and Pepper, to taste

Preheat oven to 400°.

In a non-stick skillet sprayed with cooking spray, sauté the onion until softened. Add the ground beef and cook until mostly not pink (see picture, above). Add ketchup and mustard and stir until combined. Taste, and add ketchup and mustard as necessary. Season with salt and pepper. Cook for an additional 3-5 minutes and remove from heat. Transfer to a 8" square baking pan.

Prepare cornbread mix per package directions and spread evenly over top of sloppy joes. Bake in an oven until the cornbread passes the toothpick test.

Makes 6 servings, 8 points per serving.

Ok, so I'll try the new Krispy Kreme donut

2007-03-06T09:52:00.000-05:00

Before I go any further, I have to disclose that I'm a Krispy Kreme stockholder. Yes, I bought 20 shares of KKD shortly before they got in trouble with the SEC and the stock plummeted. That's what I get for buying stocks on an empty stomach.

So good 'ol Krispy Kreme has rocked the donut world with the announcement of their new whole wheat donut. Ok, so maybe "rocked" is a little strong. In any case, that's good news for those of us who don't quite fit in their pants.

Ok, so maybe "good news" is a little strong. If you're astute enough to peruse KKD's nutritional info, you'll find that the traditional glazed orb of goodness kicks in at 5 points (200 calories, 12g fat, no fiber). A new healthy whole wheat glazed donut liberates us from donut guilt by shedding 20 calories and a gram of fat and adding 2 grams of fiber. That's right kids, they're 4 points.

Jenny and I happened to waltz into a Krispy Kreme donutery this weekend, and I took it upon myself to give the new, guilt-free donut a taste.

I spent the required 5 minutes gazing at the mechanical wonder that is the Krispy Kreme hot donut machine. Seriously, I'm a mechanical engineer and I think that this is man's greatest achievement. Such a triumph of automation! Such precision! Man went from first flight to the moon in a scant 70 years. In half that time donut robots have made even greater evolutionary gains from their humble beginnings.

It should come as no shock that after a liberal bath in glaze a wheat donut doesn't taste a whole lot different than a traditional glazed donut. As an aside, I wonder if the employees ever eat the glaze right out of the machine. I'd bet not. They're probably tipped off by the rather terrifying "watch that you don't get your fingers mangled" sticker. Or maybe there's the fact that they'd get 2nd degree burns from the molten sugar. Or it's the specter of getting fired, maybe.

Anyway, I digress. The new wheat treats are actually pretty good, if a little chewy. Are they good enough to get me to pass by an original glazed? Well, no. I'd forgo the mayo off my sammich and pony up for the real deal.

Or I'd just go with my usual chocolate-iced creme-filled and find a way to take 9 points out of my day. I guess there's a reason I only eat Krispy Kremes twice a year...

P.S. - Ok, so I know that Krispy Kreme spells them "doughnuts". It's my blog and I'll spell donut how I want to.

Happy Birthday to Me!

2007-02-27T13:15:00.000-05:00

In an inspired decision, my co-workers took me out to lunch at Atlanta's most famous BBQ joint. My camera phone only takes so-so pictures, but man are the ribs good!

Chutney is also a verb

2007-02-24T16:19:00.000-05:00

Chut-ney (chuht-nee) -

noun, a sauce or relish of East Indian origin, often compounded of both sweet and sour ingredients, such as fruits and herbs, with spices and other seasoning.

verb, the act of turning a large bag full of produce into a small jar full of tangy goo by means of excessive chopping and simmering.

-Random House Dictionary and NTSCBlog.com

This last week was our first company cookout of the year. I was originally going to do some kind of Thai grill-fest, but frankly I didn't have the guts to go there and instead I wussed out and made some Caribbean food. You know - jerk chicken, grilled shrimp, grilled vegetable skewers, black beans, etc.

Now I know this is pretty tame stuff around these parts, so I decided to prepare some kind of killer topping for my otherwise normal grill fare. Until very recently, my condiment-making experience has been confined to the occasional salsa or the random ham-fisted effort to create barbecue sauce from scratch.

However, as a semi-serious cook and foodie I owe it to myself to prepare a batch of the snootiest of condiments - chutney. And if that wasn't highbrow enough I even made mango chutney. Ha-ha! This is the kind of grill mojo that's only classy enough for Bobby Flay, Ina Garten, Mike Chiarello and the like. It's the kind of stuff that you serve to your turtleneck-wearing friends over a glass of pinot noir (not that I have anything against turtlenecks or wine).

In case you didn't get my revised definition, it's pretty shocking how most chutney recipes bend space and time by cramming 20 lbs. of groceries into an amazingly small jar. I followed this recipe from Epicurious.com, except that I doubled the simmering time to 40 minutes because it wasn't getting thicker and because Jenny and I were busy watching The Amazing Race.

The whole recipe is 48 points, but if you smother a piece of chicken with 5 cups of chutney, you're asking for it. A 2-3 tablespoon serving is about 2 points.

Anyway, in the end my meal ended up getting a little confused, culturally. I mean jerk chicken and grilled shrimp scream Caribbean, while the cinnamon, nutmeg and curry powder in the chutney are more Indian sub-continent.

In the end, none of the feasters seemed to care. It just works, and the sweet and spicy flavors dripping over hot grilled jerk chicken made me forget how itchy my turtleneck was. Now if I could just find my wine...

Update 3/8/07 - This photo was entered in this month's Does My Blog Look Good in This photography contest!

Gnocchi ala Batali

2007-02-19T11:54:00.000-05:00

Let me cut to the chase. I'm still bitter that the Food Network, in all their infinite wisdom, is canceling Molto Mario. Sure, he doesn't make everyday food but I don't care. I don't care that he uses all kinds of meats I can't find at the market (ask a supermarket fishmonger for his best cuttlefish or fresh sardines and see where that gets you). I don't care that I can't pronounce half the dishes he makes. Heck, I don't even care that he uses enough olive oil to support a small Tuscan village.

Why? Because the man is a culinary god and my favorite TV chef. I could spend all day watching him cook. To see him whip up a three course meal for his buddies is like watching a fine craftsman at work. He's the Food Network equivalent of that crazy guy on PBS who uses all those old tools to make furniture. You know, the one with the hat...

Several months ago, I made the following comment on my post about the current state of the Food Network:

I could rant on an on about how I'm tired of shows like "Easy Food" or "Food Something Made Easy". I want to see stuff that's hard to make! Show me how to roast a whole pig, or how to make a perfect beef wellington! I guess I'm just one of those rare FN viewers who has more than a basic knowledge of cooking and craves more.

You know, after all this time I stick by my comment and then some. Maybe I'm just angry because he's the only Food Network chef I've seen cook tripe (which, curiously, I can get in abundance at my supermarket) and the only one who really knows charcuterie (the highest eschelon of culinary artistry).

So when time came for my annual Valentine's Day ritual, I asked myself "what would Batali do?" and I made my love some real gnocchi.

I've used the store-bought vacuum-packed stuff before but I've always found it lacking. I decided to keep it simple and use a basic gnocchi recipe. To dress it, I improvised a creamy alfredo sauce with peas and prosciutto. It's a little heavy for everyday eating, but fantastic for a special occasion and an entirely appropriate homage to Batali.

The part Iron Chef Batali always glosses over is the two-hour baking time for the potatoes. Plan accordingly. Here are the potatoes peeled thoroughly and riced. I always seem to think my potato ricer is a little excessive until I need it and find that it's absolutely indispensable.

First off, forget about making the gnocchi dough and putting off the forming and boiling for later. That isn't such a good idea as the dough disintegrates with time. You'd be surprised how fast you get a feel for proper dough consistency when you make the recipe twice.

Second, be forewarned that this recipe makes a crapload of gnocchi. In fact, Jenny and I had to get a two-person assembly line going to make sure that everything made it through the hot tub before going all soft on us. I recommend making half a recipe (using 1 small egg for 1 extra-large).

Third, it's critical to not use too much flour. The dough should be slightly sticky. A bench scraper goes a long way towards this goal.

Finally, don't think for one second that all the effort isn't worth it. Pillowy-soft goodness accented by the salty creaminess of the prosciutto and sauce...holy cow, what a meal.

Gnocchi Alfredo with Peas and Prosciutto

1 tablespoon Butter
2 cloves Garlic, thinly sliced
1 cup Heavy Cream
1 pinch Red Pepper Flakes
2 oz. Pecorino Romano, freshly grated
2 oz. Prosciutto, thinly sliced and shredded
1/2 cup Frozen Peas
Fresh Ground Black Pepper, to taste

1/2 recipe Batali Gnocchi, cooked but not tossed in oil
Parsley, chopped
Grated Romano cheese, to taste

Melt butter in a non-stick skillet. Saute the garlic in the butter until it just starts to turn brown. Add the cream and pepper flakes and bring to a boil. Add the cheese and stir until melted. Add the prosciutto and peas and cooked until everything is back up to a boil.

Add the gnocchi and toss to coat. Serve with a little parsley, a little extra cheese and some candlelight. Save room for dessert...

This sauce doesn't reheat well. Best to make just enough for fresh consumption.

Makes 4 servings (enough for a normal meal, maybe a little small for an indulgent special occasion). Each serving is a whopping 14 points. Note that the gnocchi without sauce is 5 points per serving. Pair it with a lighter tomato sauce for a great low-point meal.

Just a quick FYI

2007-02-05T10:31:00.000-05:00

Never Trust a Skinny Chef has switched platforms to the new Blogger. What this means for all you non-blogger types is that you may find your RSS feeds have been updated with old posts and e-mail alerts may be alerting you to old content.

Anyway, just wanted you all to know!